Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Randomize