We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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