Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
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