What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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