So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize
