It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Are we in a gay sports bar?
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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