i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
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