well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
