Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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