i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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