I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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