Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Randomize
