Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
How does it feel to date your dad?
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Randomize
