Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Randomize
