In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Randomize
