Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
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