Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Randomize
