Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
