so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
