I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
