it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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