I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
