just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
