Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize
