I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
