whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Randomize
