He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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