I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
