this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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