Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
Randomize
