we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Randomize
