I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Randomize
