can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
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