About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
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