u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize