white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Randomize
