Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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