i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize
