So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Randomize
