Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
