I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
