I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize