Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
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