12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
