wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Randomize
