so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize
