We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
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