I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
this boner is exhausting
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
Randomize
