apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Randomize