8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Randomize
