Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
